[StBernard] And God created Louisiana

[Westley Annis]

Something to laugh at.  Read both.  Enjoy, , , ,
 
 
Once upon a time in the kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days.
Eventually, Michael the Archangel found him, resting on the seventh day.

He  inquired of God.  "Where have you been?"

God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly  pointed downwards
through the clouds, "Look, Michael. Look what I've made."

 Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put Life on it. I'm going to call
it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."

"Balance?" Inquired Michael, still confused

God explained, pointing to different parts of earth. "For example, northern
Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth but cold and harsh
while southern Europe is going to be poor but sunny and pleasant. "I have
made some lands abundant in water and other lands parched deserts. This one
will be extremely hot and while this one will be very cold and covered in
ice. "The Archangel , impressed by God's work, then pointed to a land mass
and said  "What's that one?""

Ah," said God. "That's  LOUISIANA -- the most glorious place on earth.There
are beautiful swamps, flowing bayou's, rolling hills, and dense forests The
people from LOUISIANA are going to be handsome, modest, intelligent,
humorous and love  good food and music. They are going to be found traveling
the world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking and high achieving,
and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of
peace."

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about
balance, God? You said there would be balance!"

God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the incompetent, crooked, lazy
idiots I've put in BATON ROUGE ."

_______________________________________________
A  LOUISIANA  BLESSING
Note: If you are not a resident of  LOUISIANA or never have lived in the
hot, humid South, you may not understand the weight of this blessing!

Bless this house, oh Lord, we cry.
Please keep it cool in mid-July.
Bless the walls where termites dine,
While ants and roaches march in time.

Bless our yard where spiders pass
Fire ant castles in the grass.
Bless the garage, a home to please 
Carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas.

Bless the love bugs, two by two, 
The gnats and mosquitoes that feed on you.
Millions of creatures that fly or crawl, 
In  LOUISIANA, Lord, you've put them all!!

But this is home, and here we'll stay,
So thank you Lord, for insect spray.