[StBernard] Will Rogers Wisdom

[Westley Annis]

	Will Rogers Wisdom
	
	
	Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was
probably the greatest political sage this country has ever known.  Enjoy the
following:  
	
	
	 
	
	1.  Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
	
	    
	
	2.  Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
	
	   
	
	3.  There are 2 theories to arguing with a
	
	woman...neither works.
	
	   
	
	4.  Never miss a good chance to shut up.
	
	 
	
	5.  Always drink upstream from the herd.
	
	  
	
	6.  If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
	
	 
	
	7.  The quickest way to double your money is to fold
	
	 it and put it back in your pocket.
	
	    
	
	8.  There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn
	
	 by reading; the few who learn by observation; the rest
	
	 of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out
	
	 for themselves.
	
	    
	
	9.  Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of
	
	 that comes from bad judgment.
	
	    
	
	10.  If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look
	
	 back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
	
	   
	
	11.  Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot
	
	 easier'n  puttin' it back.
	
	   
	
	12.  After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt
	
	 so good he started roaring.  He kept it up until a
	
	 hunter came along and shot him. 
	
	The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
	
	 
	
	 ABOUT GROWING OLDER...
	
	 
	
	 First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you
	
	 stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
	
	 
	
	Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in
line for.
	
	 
	
	Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers.
	
	 Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way.
	
	 I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't
	
	 paved.
	
	  
	
	Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to
	
	 go back to youth, think of Algebra.
	
	 
	
	 Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything
	
	 either dries up or leaks.
	
	 
	
	 Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without
	
	 getting to the top.
	
	 
	
	 Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you
	
	 about aging is that it is such a nice change from
	
	 being young.
	
	 
	
	 Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how
	
	 splendid the day has been.
	
	 
	
	 Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
	
	 
	
	 Tenth ~ Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground
	
	 with sticks, it was called witchcraft.  Today it's
	
	 called golf.
	
	 
	
	 And finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble,
	
	 you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
	
	
	mah