[StBernard] funnies

[Westley Annis]

	As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember 
	
	1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written 
	   An impressive new book.  It's called ......... 
	  'Ministers Do More Than Lay People' 
	
	2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink 
	   And be Mary. 
	
	3. The difference between the Pope and  
	   Your boss,  the Pope only expects you 
	   To kiss his ring. 
	
	4. My mind works like lightning, One brilliant 
	   Flash  and it is gone. 
	
	5. The only time the world beats a path to 
	   Your door is if you're in  the bathroom. 
	
	
	6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. 
	   The seat folded up, the drink spilled and 
	   That ice, well, it really chilled the mood. 
	
	7. It used to be
	 only death and taxes 
	   Now, of course, there's 
	   Shipping and handling, too. 
	
	
	8.. A husband is someone who, after taking 
	    The trash out, gives the impression that 
	    He just cleaned the whole house.  
	
	9 My next house will have no kitchen - just 
	   Vending machines and a  large trash can. 
	
	10. A blonde said, 'I was worried that my 
	      Mechanic might try to rip me off. 
	     I was relieved when he told me all 
	     I needed was turn signal fluid.' 
	
	11. Definition of a teenager? 
	    God's punishment...for enjoying sex.   
	
	12. As you slide down the banister of life, may 
	    The splinters never point the wrong way