[StBernard] TRUE 925: Autocorrect | Fear of Muslims | TRUE and Kids | HTML Update

Westley Annis westley at da-parish.com
Sat Mar 10 09:52:57 EST 2012

SINCE 1994 and reaching at least 42,646 subscribers, this is the 925th
weekly issue of Randy Cassingham's...

THIS is TRUE: 4 March Copyright 2012 http://www.thisistrue.com
WHAT'S BETTER THAN KNOWING THE JUDGE? Kelly S. Ballentine, 43, got three
tickets -- two alleging parking violations, and another alleging that
her automobile registration had expired. So, authorities said, she
dismissed them. Ballentine is a district judge in Lancaster, Pa. The
$268.50 she saved on the tickets, though, may cost her much more: she's
now facing a dozen criminal charges, six of them felonies. And she's
been placed on leave -- paid leave, because, said the county's
president judge, "I have no power to suspend her." (AC/York Daily
Record) ...And unlike her, he doesn't do what he has no power to do.

DAMN YOU, AUTOCORRECT! A student at a technical college sent a text
message: "Gunna be at west hall today." West Hall is a combination
middle and high school in Gainesville, Ga. There were two problems with
the message: he sent it to the wrong number, and his phone auto-
corrected the spelling of the first word -- to "gunman". The alarmed
recipient called police, who advised the school to go into lockdown to
deal with the apparent threat. Once the message was tracked down to the
sender and it became apparent that it was all a mistake, the lockdown
was lifted. (RC/Gainesville Times) ...And to anyone who can type on a
phone without ever making a mistake, we say this: You're a better man
than I am, Gunman Din.

Spammers are a much greater threat, trying to fool you into
giving them access to your computer -- and your bank accounts.

Take 15 minutes to read the Spam Primer:
it could save you EVERYTHING.

STINK BOMBS: It all started when someone at Jones County Junior College
in Ellisville, Miss., found what they thought was a bomb threat in the
bathroom. They gave the toilet paper note to a teacher, who recognized
the handwriting. Investigators eventually arrested Harold Hadley, Jr.,
19, for writing the note, which said, "I passed a bomb in the library."
Hadley, a straight-A student scheduled to graduate in May, insists he
meant something different when he used the word "bomb". His aunt
agrees: "I am going to just let modesty go and tell you we are from the
country, and so he calls passing gas -- 'bombs'," she said, and the
teacher "recognized his hand writing and it blow all out of
proportion." (MS/WDAM-TV) ...In more ways than one.

S.N.A.F.U.: "I just think that it validates to the American public that
this Congress isn't going to accomplish anything," admits Rep. Tom
Rooney, a Republican from Florida. Despite having the lowest-ever
approval ratings from voters, and general agreement that several bills
desperately need to be passed, even bills that have bipartisan support
appear unlikely to progress. "We just look dumb when we can't agree on
simple things," Rooney says. Nah, says Rep. John Garamendi, a Democrat
from California. "Chaos is standard procedure. We always hope that at
the end of that, a good law will emerge." (RC/Syracuse Post-Standard)
..."Hope" is behind every election win, but "Failure" usually follows.

SMOKING KILLS: "North Carolina Man Accidentally Drinks from Jar of
Gasoline, Smokes Cigarette, Causes Fire That Kills Him" -- Washington
Post headline

THIS WEEK'S CONTRIBUTORS: MS-Mike Straw, AC-Alexander Cohen, RC-Randy

DID YOU FIND an error? See http://www.thisistrue.com/errata.html

ONCE A WEEK ON TWITTER and Facebook, I've been posting a link to
something interesting in TRUE's archives. There's a LOT of great
material that has built up over the past nearly 18 years, and it has
been fun to remind long-time readers, or alert new readers, to some of
the best stuff. This week, that was "False, Crude and Offensive!" --
the reaction to a story about the Catholic Truth Society's then-new
special prayer to say before having sex. There were quite a few
comments to the page at that time (2009), and it started all over again
this week, with Edmund in Connecticut objecting that I'm happy to slam
Catholics (and for the record, I don't think the story DID do that),
yet I'm clearly afraid to call Muslims to task the same way. "The
reason you don't do Muslim jokes is that you can't," he charges, "not
without the grave risk of making yourself their target."

I didn't rise to the bait, but long-time reader James in Texas did this
morning, adding his own comment to point to example after example of
where I did hold those who follow Islam to the same standard as
everyone else: to simply be consistent in how they follow their own
beliefs, rather than exhibit the usual "do as I say, not as I do"
hypocrisy. The story, the original reply, and the fascinating debate
among readers is on my blog: http://ThisIsTrue.com/d-sexprayer

STORY UPDATE: Remember the story from last April, about the gang member
who had a murder scene tattooed on his chest? When a homicide detective
saw a photo of the tat, he realized it accurately depicted a murder he
was working. The guy with the tat was charged in the murder, and
jailed. I posted the police photo of his chest on my blog.

On Monday Jeff in Washington pointed me to an update: the jailed man
has been collecting unemployment benefits while in jail! Three people
have been arrested in the benefits fraud -- but not the jailed guy
(yet!) Catch the whole story including the update here:

DO YOU READ TRUE TO YOUR KIDS? I've heard from several parents that they
use these real-life stories to help teach their children not just how
to think more clearly about the ramifications of their actions, but WHY
they might wish to. I'd love to do a blog post about this, so please
tell me about your experiences doing this. How old are the kids? Do you
skip some stories? Why or why not? What sort of discussions have the
stories led to -- and how have you seen what they've learned reflected
in their lives? Please reply with your input, even if you've done so in
the past, and thanks!

IN CASE YOU'VE WONDERED: I've put off the HTMLization of the newsletters
until I finish designing and setting up the e-book collections, which
will be released on Kindle (and probably other platforms, like iBook
and Nook) "soon". If you have no idea what I'm talking about, see the
discussion at http://www.thisistrue.com/d-html

o o o

IT WAS A YEAR AGO (already?! Yep: 11 March) that a magnitude 9.0
earthquake, followed by the quake-triggered tsunami, hit Japan, causing
unimaginable destruction. TRUE's readers ponied up an amazing sum (more
than $6,500) to send to aid the people who needed it. (I've said it
before: TRUE's readers are some of the coolest people on Earth.) The
horror didn't bring up the best out of everyone, though: one comment on
my blog: "I can't believe that you actually sent money to those little
yellow animals.They can live and fight on a sock of rice for a week,
and your [sic] worried about feeding them!" Yes, well, there's always
an obliviot in every crowd, eh? http://ThisIsTrue.com/d-sendai has that
blog entry from back then, with details on how TRUE's readers helped.

FEATURED in the shopping cart this week: the hardwood, laser-engraved
(with the "Get Out of Hell Free" card image) sticky note holder. It's
available with or without custom-printed sticky notepads, and shipping
is FREE to USA *and* Canada (and just $ for overseas airmail). See the
cart's home page -- https://secure.thisistrue.com -- for the featured

THE LATEST POSTING TO JUMBO JOKE: The Massage Therapists -- a true story
of what happened to me last night. http://www.JumboJoke.com


Stone or tile? How do you decide?
The Flooring Lady, an independent flooring expert,
will help you find your way through the maze of questions.


EIGHT MORE STORIES: 1.7 pounds of marijuana was hidden in WHAT?!
Supermarket shoplifter manages to stuff more than $11,000 worth of
merchandise into his car, but he didn't get away with it -- again.
Women who were robbed were able to accurately describe robber, thanks
to the fact he was wearing his girlfriend's pink Victoria's Secret
hoodie.... Charter school dramatically improves class attendance -- by
paying students to come to school. Woman's excuse for why she beat up
her boyfriend is a bit boggling. Intruder into woman's apartment didn't
take anything, but what he DID do was quite interesting (and he was
still arrested). What happened after woman "saved" rats from a pet
store. Man busted for DUI calls his dad to bail him out, but that leads
to another problem.... The full version of TRUE has at least 10 stories
each week, often more. You don't have to continue to miss MOST of the
stories: upgrades start at just $10. http://thisistrue.com/upgrade.html
has the details.

TEN YEARS AGO IN TRUE: Con artists rip off "pilgrims" visiting the graves
of al Qaida fighters. http://www.thisistrue.com/8065

And don't forget http://i.thisistrue.com for a new story every day on
your Android, BlackBerry, iPhone, or other web-enabled phone!

THIS WEEK'S HONORARY UNSUBSCRIBE goes to William Hamilton. A theologian,
Hamilton dared to ask, out loud, "Is God Dead?" Read what happened
next: http://www.HonoraryUnsubscribe.com/william_hamilton.html

YOU CAN REALLY HELP TRUE: Send this issue (in its entirety, please) to a
friend with your personal recommendation. A friend told YOU about this
newsletter, right? Pass the favor on! Thanks.

TIRED OF BEING TOLD WHERE TO GO? "Get Out of Hell Free" with our popular
and (in?)famous cards, created in response to a reader telling Randy he
was doomed. http://www.GOOHF.com

SUBSCRIPTIONS to "This is True" are free at http://www.thisistrue.com
Published weekly by ThisIsTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway CO 81432 USA
(ISSN 1521-1932). TRUE is available to newspapers as a regular feature
column. "This is True" is a registered trademark of ThisIsTrue.Inc

COPYRIGHT 2012 by Randy Cassingham, All Rights Reserved. All stories are
completely rewritten using facts from the noted sources. ALL broadcast,
publication, retransmission to e-mail lists, WWW or any other copying
or storage, in any medium, online or not, is STRICTLY PROHIBITED
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than three copies to any one person -- after that, they should get
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violations of our copyright to us.

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