[StBernard] senior funnies

[Westley Annis]

Okay St. Bernardians...we need a couple of chuckles..
JY


 


	Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, both could barely
see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an
intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The
woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing! it. I
could have sworn we just went through a red light." 
	
	After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the
light was red again. 
	
	Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was
almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she
was losing it.! 
	She was getting nervous. At the next intersection, sure enough, the
light was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman
and said, "Mildred, do you know that we just ran through three redlights in
a row? You could have killed us both!" 
	
	Mildred turned to her and said, "Crap, am I driving?" 
	______________________________________________________ 
	
	An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her
car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to
the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake
pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried. 
	
	The dispatcher say, "Stay calm, Maam, an officer is on the way." 
	
	A few minutes later, the officer radios in. 
	
	"Disregard.", He says. "She got in the back-seat by mistake."