[StBernard] Expanding higher ed access for low income students

[Westley Annis]

Laurie,

Since I'm not too busy tonite and since your husband enjoys Jeri Ryan as
much as I do, I'd like to share this story with you.

First, I have to explain something to set up my story.  Like your husband, I
always have to ooooh and aaaahh over Jeri Ryan to my wife - and of course
she could care less.  I'd always tell my wife (to the point of her getting
sick of hearing it)..."Baby, I love you, but I would not pass up an
opportunity with Jeri Ryan if she offered and for the same reason a
mult-millionaire will stoop down to pick up a hundred dollar bill on the
sidewalk - because why pass it up."

She laughs it off and reminds me of her thing for Don Johnson.  And I tell
her "go for it. If you ever meet Don Johnson and he makes a move on you,
I'll understand."  Hell, if I was woman I'd probably go for Don Johnson as
well.

Okay, so now that I have that out of the way, I can tell my story.

In the Spring of 2004, I was in Metairie for an appointment near a hotel
(what used to be called the Causeway Hotel near I-10) where a good friend of
mine was asst. head chef, so I decided I would stop by and see him.  As I
made my way toward the banquet hall kitchen I noticed the hotel seemed very
busy - some people were walking around in strange costumes.  I asked my
friend, "what's going on at the hotel?"  He said they had one of those
sci-fi conventions going on.  I asked if there were any big names appearing
like William Shatner or Leonard Nimoy.  He said this wasn't on the scale of
those big sci-fi conventions out west but there was a cast member from Star
Trek: Voyager appearing that day.  I asked who?  He said some girl named
Jeri something?  I almost flipped out.  I said "Jeri Ryan?"  He said that
was her.

I immediately called my wife on my cell phone and informed her what was
going on.  I told her "I know you're expecting me home in the next hour but
there's a chance I'll be delayed - possibly until tonite or tomorrow" and I
proceeded to tell her that Jeri Ryan was in the very same hotel I was in.

She told me "go for it, Tiger."  So, I found my way to the convention's
registration desk.  Come to find out Jeri wasn't staying at the hotel but
was just flying in for the show that day and flying right back out.  So, I
knew I'd have to work fast.  Maybe I could catch her attention at an
autograph signing - after all, I'd be the only "normal" looking person there
(not wearing pointed ears or a Klingon costume), so I figured that increased
my chances and might make me look more appealing.

Next came the crushing blow.  This convention of "need-to-get-life nerds"
cost $165 to get in - but as they explained "but that includes all 3 days
plus the film rooms" (whatever those are).  I let out a slow, deep sigh
gazing at the ballroom doors knowing Jeri was just beyond them waiting for
me and said "no thanks."

I showed up at home an hour later - naturally my wife asked why I was home
so early - I told her what happened.  She looked at me and said (with a
smerk) "the obvious moral to this story is even the price for love has its
limits."  Without a good comeback I resorted to the next best tactic by
sticking my tongue at her.  And she added..."besides, if you were smart you
would have waited outside in the parking lot where her limo was waiting and
asked for a lift to the airport since your car wouldn't start."

I told her..."is that the strategy you're going to use on Don Johnson?"

I hope you enjoyed my story....and every bit of it is TRUE.

John