[StBernard] Wal-Mart Doctor....

[Westley Annis]

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My
elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor." 


"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. 


"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample
and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. 


It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - Alot cheaper than a doctor." 


So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. 


He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine
sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. 


Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: 


"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart." 


That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began
wondering if the computer could be fooled. 


He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his
wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure. 


Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten
dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results. 


The computer prints the following: 


1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog
has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter
has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get
better! 


Thank you for shopping @ Walmart